What Kind of Mother Are You? (not a facebook quiz)

The upcoming Mother's Day holiday has got me thinking. There are so many different types of Mothers out there.
I, for one, have struggled over the years to make the right decisions for my kids. As I'm sure every parent does.

And some of my parenting styles are different from a lot of people around me. I've said before, I am not a hover-mother. At all. I am a huge, huge advocate of my children becoming independent, and confident. I want them to be able to take care of themselves. I don't want them to go out into the world, and not know who they are, or what to do because I can't always be there to hold their hands. My husband and I joke that it's lazy parenting. Because if the kids ask for something, we tell them to get it themselves. It's funny to act like we're lazy. But, I have principles behind my actions.

I've been criticized by other parents, scolded by complete strangers, and been given plenty of unsolicited advice from well-intending passerby's, who tell me how I should or should not be raising my children.
And on many occasions, I have found myself disciplining my children, more for the benefit of the people watching, and less for the benefit of my children.

Have you ever done that?

I've decided that that is the wrong approach to motherhood. No one should tell a mother how to raise her own children. Unless they are in immediate physical danger, I think people need to just butt out, and let a mother, who is doing the best she can, do what she feels is best for her children.

Everyone has different parenting styles. Even my siblings and I have different techniques we use in raising our kids.

I think I am a good Mom. But, I doubt myself a lot. It's one of my biggest insecurities. I have a lot of fear and anxiety over how my kids will ultimately turn out.

I do take time for myself. I run. I write music. I read. I blog. My husband and I get a babysitter and go out on dates frequently. As a mother, is that selfish? Is the mother who sacrifices herself, her hobbies, and completely devotes her life to her children a better mother than me?

I really don't think so. She has her ways that work for her, I have mine. I think I give my children the love and attention that they need.

Besides, I want my daughters to grow up, get married, have babies, and still have an identity beyond their family. Of course, being a mother is at the top of the priority list. But, I think it's important to teach my children to follow their dreams, and keep being who they are no matter what blessings or trials life brings them.

My children are independent, energetic, little spit-fires. And I love them that way. They test the limits, they ask questions, and can't find the answer, they search for it, and sometimes they get into trouble in the process. They are great kids.

And I know they were sent to this earth with the energy that they have for a reason. Whatever it is that they have to conquer in the life, they will need those personality traits to do it. And it's my job to guide them, and help them to blossom those talents.

So, what kind of Mother are you?