Thursday, August 25, 2011

My Baby Story

How do I fit six months worth of thoughts into one post?  Impossible.  But, since I am sitting at my computer (a rare thing, these days), trying to write a song, and getting stumped, I thought I'd distract myself with my long, lost blog.  I was asked, yesterday, to write an arrangement of "How Great Thou Art" for a funeral tomorrow. 

That's actually a couple of things I haven't done in a long, long time.   I've ignored the narrator in my head that used to dictate what and when to write.  And I've set aside the little melodies tumbling around inside my skull. 

Other things have taken their place. Not the least of which is the fact that I am eight months pregnant.   So many thoughts go through my head daily about my pregnancy, my baby, my family.  I am overjoyed about having another baby.  I have waited for this angel to enter our lives for a lot of years. Even in the earlier years after I had B, when time seemed to speed past me, and I didn't feel like I was ready for another baby, I always knew that, eventually, I would want more.  Then, when I finally made that decision, with my husband, to invite another spirit into our family,  I was thrust into a whirlwind of health problems that ultimately led me to believe that there would be no more babies.  I was devastated.  We looked, very seriously, into adoption.  We started saving our pennies.  And I asked my doctor every month, at each appointment, if the prognosis had changed about me being able to get pregnant.  He explained the risks of my illness, of passing the disease on to my baby, and of the health risks to me, especially after radiation. 

Then, miraculously (and I attribute this to my discovery of essential oils), my hormone levels improved, stabilized, and my doctor told me that the risks had been reduced significantly.  He gave me the go ahead to start trying.  My husband and I discussed it again, focusing a lot on the my tendency to have post partum depression.  It was so bad the last three times, it was terrifying.  What if one more baby is the one thing that sends me over the edge?  What if I end up being the crazy mom who drowns all of her kids?  This was one major issue we weren't willing to overlook.  I prayed.   Harder than ever.  And at the end of the day, we made the ultimate decision to leave in the Lord's hands.  Six months went by.  And I remember having the conscious thought, and voicing it to my husband, that I'd finally come to be at peace with only having three kids.  That we have a good, no, great life, and I will accept this reality.

The next month, I discovered I was pregnant.  Humbled and overwhelmed, I have been making plans for the past eight months for this new little person to join our family.  And I couldn't be more excited.

I've had thoughts  I've been afraid to vocalize for fear that would mean they are a premonition.  I worry about the health of my baby.  More so that I ever did with my others.  I worry about complications with the delivery, about her coming too early.  I worry there will be something wrong with her.  I worry I will fall off the deep end when she comes, or that my illness with rear its ugly head again, and I won't be able to care for my family.  I worry about the crazy schedule we have for the kids, and teaching piano, and not being able to do it all.  

And so, I pray.  Everyday, I pray that my sweet baby will be healthy and strong, and come right when she supposed to.  And I pray everyday, that this time, I won't get depressed.  That the tools I've gathered over the years to combat my depression will do their job.  I pray for my children, that I can still give them all that they need with this new addition.  And for my husband, who works so hard for our family, and is such an amazing support to me. 

And I can't wait to meet my little girl....

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Fight For Faye Fundraiser

I just wanted to put in another plug for my cousin's little girl, Faye's fundraiser, coming up on Saturday, July 9th, at North Layton Jr High, in Layton, UT.

Here's the link to read about all of the events, and register!

It's going to be a lot of fun, and for a great cause!

Here's a breakdown of some of the activities we're going to have at the event:

5k fun run
Huge yard sale
Silent Auction
FREE Carnival
Live Entertainment

Thursday, May 26, 2011


Want to hear about my latest project? Back in January, my dear friend, Chris, who is the Primary chorister in my ward, came to me with a brilliant idea. She thought it would be nice to have the monthly scriptures that the primary learns to be set to music. So for the past six months, I have been writing little one liners for the primary scriptures. I can't keep them to myself, so I wanted to let you all know, they are available for FREE upon request. Because I am still working on figuring out how to put sheet music into an html for simple download, for now, Please send an email, or comment with your email address, if you would like to "subscribe" to receive a monthly scripture song, and I will email you back with pdf files for the sheet music.

The songs available are as follows:

Feast Upon the Words of Christ (2 Nephi 32:3)

For Behond (Moses 1:39)

What I the Lord (D&C 1:38)

April: Articles of Faith 1:3
(this is an article of faith, and Vanja Watkins has already written beautiful music for the articles of faith, therefore I didn't write a song for this month)

Hear Him (Joseph Smith--History 1:17)

June: Articles of Faith 1:4)
(this is an article of faith, and Vanja Watkins has already written beautiful music for the articles of faith, therefore I didn't write a song for this month)

Sacred Ordinances ("The Family: A Proclamation to the World", paragraph 3)

I will be writing the rest of the year's scripture songs in the coming months.

Feel free to share them with your Primary!


Friday, May 20, 2011

Babies, Running, Puppies, Stress Dreams...I should probably just name this post Random stuff

I think I've gotten really, really good at fitting all of my blubbering idiocy into a one liner and posting it on facebook.  I think that's the real reason I haven't posted on my blog in so long.  But for the sake of not looking like one of those dorks who posts 8 times a day on facebook (I think I only posted 7 yesterday, so I'm pretty sure I'm safe), I thought I'd put all my random thoughts on here today.

Where to begin?  It's been awhile.  A LONG while.  How about some catch up photos?

So, to start, in January, C and I went to Hawaii, and then Phoenix for two back to back business trips. I took a total of like 4 pictures. On my phone.  I'm a great world traveler.

Then, the day after I got back from our trip, I discovered a little treat that will change our lives forever!

C and I signed up last fall to run in a series of 5 races from 5k, 10k, 10 miler, half marathon, and a 30k. The first one was the Saturday after we got back from our trip.  I ran 4 of them.  I decided to skip the 30k, after running the half and it hurt. Here were are after the 5k.

In March, I had a birthday.  I turned 29 again!  And two days later, in a moment of weakness, we got a puppy.  He's stinkin' cute, though, you have to admit. 

His name is Scooter and he's a black lab/blue heeler mix. He's really a good dog, and loves kids, especially my piano students. He likes to sit under the piano on their feet and listen during piano lessons. Some of the kids don't mind, some do. I don't blame them.

April flew by. I really can't remember it. Like at all. I must have been too busy being pregnant to remember anything. I think maybe Easter or Spring break may have happened during that month. I can't be too sure.

May.  Sheesh, I almost die every year during May.  Why do we schedule everything during May?  Soccer, baseball, softball, piano recital, Ogden marathon (tomorrow!!), Mother's Day.  My brother, Spencer came home from his mission, and my brother, Mason, is leaving us next Wednesday for his mission.  I'm so proud of those boys.  They've grown up so much, and I literally (and figuratively) look up to them both so much. 

So, I'm running the Ogden marathon tomorrow.  Well, I'm signed up for the full.  But considering my current condition, I made the difficult choice to only run half.  Illegally.  Don't tell anyone.  I still paid.  I'm just only going to run half of it.  My time won't count, but who cares, this will be my slowest half marathon on the books, so we're not counting it anyway.  So, I woke up this morning around 6:15 (at the exact time my dog decides to wake up every day), in a complete panic.  My running group is planning on meeting at 6:00 to drive up to the start of the race.  I couldn't for the life of me remember if today was Friday or Saturday.  And in my half-asleep state, I thought if it is Saturday, I'm late, but what happened to Friday, I don't remember it at all!  I decided it was Friday, and went back to sleep.  I hope I don't do the same thing again tomorrow.

I also dreamt two nights ago that I had my baby, and that she was several weeks old, and I was just now getting around to deciding to nurse her for the first time.  She didn't look malnourished or anything, I'd just put it off, but there was that panicked feeling like maybe I'd waited too long to start feeding her.

And then there's the usual dream about forgetting my locker com, and forgetting to go to math class all semester, and then finding out that I'm failing.

Maybe I'm more stressed than I think I am?

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Floppy Hat Faye

I just wanted to send everyone over to my cousin Stacey's blog.  I love her so much, and my heart goes out to her family.

Stacey just had her 3rd baby on April 4th.  Just one week later, her sweet little 3-year-old girl, Faye, was diagnosed with AML Leukemia.  She just started her first round of chemo, and will be in the hospital for at least 6 months.

Please, go visit her blog, read her story, and donate to their cause, if you can.


Thursday, March 10, 2011

Oh, the Wisdom of Children

From the brilliant 9 year old mind of K.

Monday, February 28, 2011


You know, I've been meaning to sign in and write something for over a month.  I don't know if it's because I really have nothing to talk about, or if I've just gotten out of the habit, but I don't even think about blogging anymore.

I've been thinking about why something that used to usurp so much of my life and energy has fallen so far on the back burner that its practically non-existent.  There are a few reasons that I've come up with.

1. Several months ago (like a year ago) my husband gave me his old Blackberry.  So, now everything I ever possibly needed via the Internet  (i.e. email, facebook, Google), I now do on my phone.  And my computer is really, really stupid and slow, so I hardly ever turn it on anymore, except for the kids to play webkinz and club penguin.

Besides, have you ever tried to read or write a blog post on a phone?  It's nearly impossible.  I say nearly, because I have tried it before, but it's extremely difficult.  And forget proof reading.  I'd need a telescope.

2.  I'm a trend follower.  Back in 2007 or 2008 or whenever it was that I started my blog, blogging was what the "cool kids" were doing.  It was a fad.  Every person who had anything whatsoever to say had a blog.  And I spend countless hours lurking on people's blogs at the beginning.  I think it was the scrapbooking craze of this decade.  (And yes, after I got married and first had babies--I actually used to scrapbook.  I even sold scrapbooking supplies for awhile--shocking, I know).
I really think that the whole nuance of blogging has changed.  It seems now that those who held out and stuck around in blog land are no longer people who want to post pictures of their kids, but those who are true writers, and people who legitimately want to and know how to make money from blogging.  My hat goes off to you. 
But honestly, that is just not me.

3.  This is probably my biggest reason for not blogging anymore.  At some point in the last year, I sat up, opened my eyes, and thought to myself, "Who were my real life friends before I started blogging?"  I honestly couldn't remember.  And while I appreciate those I came into contact with because of blogging, I discovered that I had alienated myself for the real people in my life, for people that lived inside my computer, who only presented a tiny piece of themselves, and who only saw a tiny piece of me.  I had to back off.  Nothing, and I mean NOTHING, is better than real life contact, communication, touch, laughter.

I have no intention of deleting my blog, or even to stop blogging.  I still like it. 

I really just needed to get back to what's real in my life.

Friday, January 14, 2011

The 10 Basics of Prevention for Colds and Flu

I got an email today from one of the higher-ups of the company, doTERRA, that I buy my essential oils from.  I have becoming increasingly more inspired by what these oils have done, and continue to do for my and my family's health. 

About a month ago, I got really sick.  Right before Christmas.  The week before we were supposed to leave town for a business trip, that meshed into a family trip, right before Christmas.  Turns out, I tested positive for H1N1.  Since I was diagnosed with Grave's disease, my immune system seems to be compromised.  I catch everything.  I never used to get sick. 
Once, I started getting symptoms, I immediately went on the essential oil anti-viral regimen (2 drops of Oregano, 2 drops of Lemon, 2 drops of On-Guard (an oil blend that strengthens the immune system) in a capsule--3 times a day).  On the second day, I decided to go to the doctor, just to get a diagnosis.  Sure enough--Swine Flu. I had it bad.  Fever, headache, nausea, fatigue, sinus congestion, cough, not to mention the razor blades in my chest.  I immediately called my dear friend, Natalie, who I affectionately refer to as my Guru.  That night, bless her heart, she came over with a whole slew of oils in her hands.  She gave me an amazing spinal treatment, using Oregano (kills virus and bacteria), Thyme, Peppermint (which reduces fevers and settles upset stomach), and a massage blend called Aroma touch.  Then she put a hot compress on me, and let me stew. 
The next morning, I was amazed at how much better I felt.  I could breath.  I could get out of bed, and get things done to get ready for our trip in two days.  By the day after that, I was almost completely better. 

So, I thought I should copy paste a part of this email I got, that gives very specific instructions on how to prevent colds and flu from onset.  I figure prevention is way better than trying to get over it once it's already in your system. 

"It's funny that to many of our neighbors and friends Wendy and I are known as the Oil people. I wonder if they picture us flitting around the house in light flowing saffron fabric clothes, spritzing the air with lavender and patchouli oils as incense and diffusers are filling the air around us.

Of course that is until they've had it with weeks of flu like symptoms, they've lost their voice, and they've broken ribs from all the coughing. They have rashes from the anti-biotic that the doctor gave them that don't work on the flu anyway! (Antibiotics will not work with virus, only bacteria)
This is when they finally knock on the door, where we are greeted with the old axiom... "I'm willing to try anything; do you have an oil for this?"

This is quite discouraging to seasoned oilers who understand how essential oils work and how virus spreads. Even more discouraging that they would not trust you enough to try the oils until there was literally no other option.
What we know about flu virus is that once it enters the body through a mucus membrane, it attacks human cells very aggressively. Depending on the victim's immune system, it will take only a short time before the victim begins to feel symptoms. If you start to fight it aggressively at that point, it is likely that the severity and length of the sickness will weaken.

However, if the first symptoms are ignored or if little or no action is taken, you might find yourself in the middle of a health battle that will take some time and great effort!

Thus, the best way to combat cold and flu virus in the beginning is three fold...
1) Prevent virus from entering a mucus membrane.
2) Keep your body's immune system strong so virus is attacked and stopped before starts to spread.
3) AT THE ONSET (ATO) aggressively use essential oils and other tools to kill what virus has already started.

Cold & Flu Prevent--10 basics of prevention.

At the last doTerra convention, what prevention method did Dr. Hill bring up first?

1. Wash your hands often with soap and water, especially after you cough sneeze or wipe your nose. Tissues should be discarded immediately in a wastebasket.

This is more prevention for others in your family or in school, or the work place. But you should also be very aware of what you are touching with your hands. Do you wash your hands after using any facilities? Do you use a paper towel to turn off water faucets, or open or close stall and bathroom doors?

I do not use drinking fountains at all during flu season.

2. Cover your nose and mouth with a tissue when you cough or sneeze. Discard the tissue immediately in a waste basket.
Again, in consideration of others.

3. Run your diffuser often in your home and at work. What oils? Any oil would be good, but consider On Guard for sure. It was developed to boost our immune systems, and guard us against pathogens. I hear it humming away right now as I write. We have several teachers in our kid's school running them during class time.

4. While we are talking on guard, I would also consider rubbing your children's and your own feet with on guard every night before bed time and every morning before they put shoes on for the day. Not only is it a bonding experience for you and your children, but it will bolster there immune systems.

5. Consider misting your family's bed sheets with a spritz of essential oils before bedtime. 10 drops of on guard or some other essential oil with a ¼ cup of water in a spray bottle - shake well. We sometimes use serenity which will both kill pathogens and can help induce a deeper sleep.

6. When doTerra started carrying Melissa essential oil, Dr. Hill recommended a daily routine during cold and flu season of 1 drop of Melissa and 1 drop of On-Guard under the tongue each morning. Great for boosting the immune system.

7. Put about 1 drop of lemon and 1 drop of lime essential oil for every 10-12 oz of water you and your family drink. Over time this will greatly strengthen the immune system. In our home, we have not had colds or flu of any significance in over a year since we started incorporating essential oils in our household. And this is one have been consistent with.

8. As always, as you clean regularly around your home, use essential oils to clean. Purify, On guard or lemon in a spray bottle used for cleaning will assure pathogen free surfaces.

9. Take care of your body! This might be as or more important than any preventive oils you can take. You must get regular sleep - 8 hours continuous. No late nights or strange hours. Eat healthy food, plenty of fruits, vegetables and water, especially during flu season!!

10. Make your home a happy place, free from stress. A haven with kind words and positive thoughts. Make home a place of safety and refuge. As storms rage on, have your home be a house of prayer, gratitude, health and love.

These are all things we can do that will create of synergy of protection for your home and family."

For more information on essential oils, and to read some great articles on how they work, you can visit my friend Natalie's blog:

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

The Next Gordon Ramsay?

I got a new i-Touch for Christmas. And my kids have taken it over. I found today that it has 450+ photos and videos on it. They've been having a lot of fun, apparently. This video was a sweet surprise. There are probably 5 "cooking shows" from my little guy making different 7-yr-old friendly food items.
I get such a kick out of the brilliant, creative mind of that boy.