Saturday, July 10, 2010

Random Sherisms and Random Tunes

I intended to go for a run on Monday morning. But I was so tired from all the partying we'd done on Saturday and Sunday with all of the 4th of July festivities, and I just couldn't bring myself to even set my alarm for 5 am. So, my intention was to go for a solo run while my hubby, who had the day off work, went to the park to play football with his buddies. He plays every Saturday. And he takes the kids to the park with him, and they run around, ride their bikes, and play at the playground, while he plays, and I stay home and relax, or go for a run. Sounds nice, right?

Well, I decided to meet them at the park, brought the stragglers (kids who didn't wake up in time to get dressed and ride with Dad), the bikes, and planned to go for a short run after we got everyone unloaded. But when I got there, I discovered that some of C's friends hadn't shown up to play. They were short a player. And you know what? They let me play. All of these good ole boys let this...girl (for lack of a better work) play football with them.

And let me tell you people, I had the time of my life. It was the best workout I've had in a long time. My thighs were killing me the next day (the good burn), but it was so much fun. So, I begged C to let me come back and play every week. He said, I could, as long as I bring another girl to play with me.

So, who wants to come up to my hood and play some football with me? It's fun! And not as hard as you'd think. It's just touch (no tackling), and such a great workout. Who's with me?


I went back to the doc on Tuesday. For the past month of so, I have been beside myself and out of my head. Once again, I started feeling tired again. This past month it just got worse and worse. The worst it's been since before my radiation treatment. I've been a walking zombie. And so depressed I could hardly function. Not to mention my complete inability to focus on anything besides the tiny little reflective bubble I was trapped inside. (Reflective because all I could see was me). And let's not even begin to discuss the fact that I've gained 9 pounds in the last month. I was going to write a post about belly fat, and how for the first time in my life....I have some. But I decided it might render some heckling, so I decided against it. Shhh...don't tell anyone about that okay?

So...on Tuesday, I went back to the endocrinologist. He looked at my blood results and showed me how my hormone levels had plummeted despite a recent increase in my meds. All I could think of to say was, "...figures." So, I got another increase in dosage. Thank the synthroid gods!

Plus, I've been doing a lot of research about supplementing my lack of thyroid function with foods. Did you know spinach is bad for thyroid? I'm so bummed. I LOVE spinach, and I eat it like almost every day. sigh. You know what's supposedly good for thyroid function? Crap. Like caffeine, coffee, tea, chocolate, etc. I think that's not true, though, because I drink like 7 Cokes a day, and I still feel like crawling in a hole to die.

It was also reaffirmed that because of how extreme my hormone levels are it would be wise for me to indefinitely prevent pregnancy. We've been discussing the possibility over the past few months, and the complications associated with having an autoimmune disease, and I think I'm finally at peace with being done having children.

Here's hoping that the new dosage in my meds helps me to have the energy to care for the kids I've got!


Because I've been so moody and emotional lately, I was in a really foul mood the other night. I couldn't sleep. So, I got up, and start writing down my thoughts. It turned into a song. And I totally love it! It's a very angry song, but it rocks. I'm still working out some parts where I may or may not have put in some expletives. I'll probably take those out and rewrite some parts before it's actually published.


I didn't post this on Friday, because I spent all day recording all of my new songs for a demo. I have no intention of the general public hearing them, unless you want to hear the unmastered clicks, and bumps, heavy breathing in between vocal sets, children stomping, screaming and slamming doors in the background. Yes, when I record at home, I am my own sound engineer.

I recorded a demo for my band to learn guitar/drum/whatever other instruments I can think of part. I'm so excited!

So for my music list, I'm going to list the titles of a few of my new songs, just to peak your interest.

1) Three Days (piano solo)
2) Where I've Been
3) Dreams
4) Did You Think to Pray (piano solo)
5) Weight of the World
6) Generations

.....I need a few more songs to make a full album. So, I need your help. I need ideas for new song topics, suggestions for cover songs/arrangements. Should I fill out the rest with new vocal songs, or should I put in more piano stuff (like me first album)? Input appreciated!


Kristina P. said...

I really hope that these darn thyroid levels get figured out!

And I would love to hear your new music.

Annette Lyon said...

Ick for feeling like crap--yay for doctors who can help.

Lara said...

SPINACH is bad for thyroid. This is the most depressing news I've heard all day. No wonder I blew out my thyroid in the last few years. I practically live on the stuff.

I hope you feel better soon!

Missy said...

I would hyperventilate the first two minutes of a football game! LOL
I never realized your thyroid could do so much to make you feel bad! Hope your levels level and you feel better soon!
I love "piano stuff" as you put it! I don't think you could go wrong with that type!
Great post!

wendy said...

I'd love to play football with Ya'all. But I can't throw the dang ball, I'd just do the tackling.

and I could out do you on belly fat any day girl.

sorry you have had health issues again. It is neat that you can put your feelings to music and have a release that way.

Garden of Egan said...

I just love you!
I'm sorry you struggle with your thyroid so much. You take such good care of yourself and it doesn't seem fair.
I do horrid things to mine and I feel guilty.
You are in my prayers.

I would love to hear to music, even the raw stuff. I think you are so gifted.

Andrea said...

I picked a good day to read blogs! What a good post. You say that you are all beside yourself, but I would say that you are IN THE ZONE! I would LOVE to play football. Ever since I married my non-loving-sports (non-sports-loving... sports-non-loving...) Ever since I married a guy who does not love sports, I have completely missed playing football and basketball - and the ladies church basketball doesn't count because that is just not fun. However, I doubt I could swing it. I totally get the anger thing too, my best thoughts and conversations with myself happen when I am angry. Only bummer is when I try to verbalize them, they just sound stupid. Glad you could verbalize them and make it work. I bet that would be theraputic. My comment is turning into a blog. Maybe I should actually try it, it's been like 5 months. Long story short, good post!