Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Alzheimers?

Over the past few days, I've had a ton of thoughts running through my mind.
I don't know if any of you do this, but when I'm thinking about something, I always try to figure out how I would word it if I wrote it in my blog.

So, I logged on today, to do a little writing, and...

everything has vanished....from my head. It's like my hard drive crashed. I'm don't remember one thing I was going to talk about. NOT. ONE. THING.

I don't know if it's normal Mommy forgetfulness, you know, because school started, life has been crazy, trying to get on the schedule again....or if I really am starting get alzheimers.

You laugh, but I'm totally serious. I really think I have alzheimers.

My great grandma Ruth had alzheimers for 20 years. I remember her as a small child, asking me the same questions, telling the same stories over and over.
She passed away at the age of 91. I was 23...I was pregnant with my first baby. I found out I was having a girl, came home from the doctor's office, and got a phone call telling me that Grandma Ruth has passed away.

I Loved my Grandma Ruth. I really think we are kindred spirits. She was such an inspiration to me. Every so often, I feel her prescence. I'm sure she's not actually coming to visit me from the spirit world, but I know the memory of her is still very strong with me. She played the piano, directed a county-wide Relief Society women's choir, wrote short stories, sang. She was my role model. I remember, once she started to lose her memory, she always remembered me as "the one who plays the piano." It didn't even bother me that she couldn't remember my name, because it meant so much to me that she remembered that I played the piano.
If everyone else were to remember me that way, I would be just fine with that!
She was also a fabulous cook! A trait that, unfortunately, I did not inherit. I remember going to her house, and it seems she always had popcorn balls for us.
My great grandpa Clyde, her husband, passed away before I was born. But I used to love going up in the attic (even though it was a little scary), and look at all his old stuff. His cane, his hat, his clothes.
I felt I could get to know him through those things.
When Grandma passed away, my Grandma Jean (her daughter) gave me all of her old music.
What a treasure! There are little notes made my Grandma Ruth on some of them. They are something I will always treasure.

I know there is a picture of me and Grandma at her 80th birthday party. I searched and searched, but couldn't find it.
Here are a couple of pictures from the book that Grandma Jean made for her 80th birthday. They are photocopies, but still you can see what a beautiful person she is.

Grandma Ruth at age 80


Grandma Ruth and Grandpa Clyde, I don't know when this was, maybe in the late sixties or early seventies. He died in 1975 or 76, I think.

7 comments:

MERRIANNE said...

she is definitely a beautiful woman!! i am sure you will be following in her footsteps...you are already off to a good start! :)

{isn't it craZy that so many Bloggy Women are PMS-ing right now?!?!!}

The Jensen Family said...

I love KJ's first day of school pictures! I really can't believe how old she has gotten. When I first started dating Nate she was a baby! Has that much time passed already?!

I totally understand the going blank thing. I'll call Nate with something really important and then he answers and I'm like I don't know I just called so have a nice day. Then what really bothers me is that I never remember the really important thing!

Natalie said...

I had to best comment to post but I totally forgot what I was going to write.... I'm not even kidding.
OK I re-read your post and now I remember... Do you remember the trains up in the attic? I was so bummed when I moved into Grandma Ruths house and the train set had been taken out.

Sher said...

I do remember the train. I still want Grandma's old Chickering piano. It makes me really sad that its sitting in that house, being neglected.

Smith Family said...

I know what you mean about not remembering anything, sometimes I wonder if it is adult ADD? Anyway, I'm glad you put pictures of grandma ruth on your blog. Paity always asks me what she looked like and now I can show her.

Nick and Stacey said...

I love this post! I do remember loving to go over to Grandma Ruths, and always trying to walk up into the attic, or down in the basement for that matter, not just cuz I was scared, but because the stairs were so darn steep! Anyways I think we all get a little forgetful...its okay, it just makes life a little more exciting, to see what you would really remember!

Spence said...

You'll probably never see this because this is from way back when, but I thought I'd comment because I didn't notice these posts then and they are really cool. I need to record my thoughts more often. Because your blog is cool.